I Choose Both

I do say my  dear little one... if you were sitting at a booth just to the west of some airline fandango would you choose to skip right or skip left. If right then by all means continue on I pray thee. If not, however, which I am likely assured to be the case, then do say when and how long squoze has been a word. Say on for I have not the time, the talent, nor the where to with to seek another answer from another source. And if, saying it chances your oncy, whole is to hole as mol is to mole then why the lengthening. Why add more to our eight hundred thousand strong. Gilead and his three hundred once sufficed. Yet still we've nothing of import to report. So pick your battles. They'll both end up married any way.

Debatable

I be glad I went. Nothing but good times had by all the chitlins. Please remain seated.  The next available doctor will be right with you. How do I say this?... my shoes are falling apart, my socks are soaked, I've not eaten today, my joints aren't joining, there're still another three hours before night games and well I sort of finished my homework and the last of an egg salad platter. Building H is still up and the north field is still covered from the last time. I'll bring you back something nice. Alas right now I gotta jet. So, quick, son, give me your ear and I'll let you in on a little secret. There's nothing better.

Don't Shoot Your Brother

They've been telling you for years. You can't seem to stop yourself. You can't seem to want to. Then one smashing day you wake up late to something that says not today Chuck. But I'm not a kid, I'm thirty five. Yesm and it's your time. But I don't want ye crayfish. No?   No.

And so it precipitates. Endingly, you realize that you bag that bird and eventually you'll find that an elephant has busted down through your basement. You'd think on the inside the lodge could hold. Yet everyone passing on the outside who has a mind to look, and some do, know that you've got more than problems with your fire marshal. So birds? crayfish? squirrels? Leave the small critters be.

There's a First for Everything These Days

The first man on the moon. The first lady. The first lady's first man. The first drink of a bottle of scotch. The first amendment. The first round of golf. The first time you tasted kellogg's corn flakes again. The first planet. The first digit in the number fifty. Or forty seven. The first second place. First contact.  First person. First grade. First base. The first object in an empty set. 

Oh wait...    I guess there isn't one of those.